I’m Quitting Social Media

This has been a long time coming — as many of you know.

The common response is “really??” and “why?” and “but what about..”

Somehow you and I have been tricked into believing we need this thing that didn’t exist a few years ago, is ruining many lives, and making all of us less happy.

Why?

1. I don’t feel connected to you.

My interactions on social media are not meaningful. We all want to keep up with our friends, but we’ve been duped into believing that social media is effective for this. There are of course exceptions, but on the whole I’m certain there are better ways to truly connect with each other.
I’m not sharing things that matter on social media. This is largely my fault of course. But I also think you likely do the same, and the system thrives off of us posting for likes rather than true human connection, and then endlessly scrolling to “keep up with” (compare ourselves to) our friends’ lives.
I’m missing out on real life. When we’re always trying to get the perfect picture to show people who aren’t present what our life isn’t like, we miss out on experiencing who and what is actually present to us. I don’t want to miss another glorious moment of real life. More on this in the video at the bottom of the page.

2. I’m addicted.

This is by design. In the free (advertising) model, attention = $$. So the more effort social media dynasties can devote toward maximizing attention (addiction), the more money they make. There are whole psychology departments in many of these companies working around the clock to figure out how they can get us more addicted.
“I’m resting, being social, and being productive.” This is what my addiction tells me, but of course none of those things are actually true. I’d rather devote these wasted hours – which are many – to truly restful, social, and productive activities.
Nothing has fully helped. I’ve tried several different methods for establishing healthy boundaries but I’ve come to the conclusion that, like an alcoholic, the best path toward health for me is abstinence.

3. Demand –> Supply.

We all feel trapped, like it’s a necessary evil. But it’s not. There are in fact much better ways to connect, and the more people boycott social media, the more likely it is that even a more helpful alternative will arise. In the meantime: text, email, and calls work great when not in person.
Negativity wins, so jerks reign in social media land. Negative emotions attract the most attention, and so businesses are playing into the social media anger-and-hate game, profiting big time by promoting content that gets heavy negative responses. So jerks reign.

What About…

1. Keeping in touch?

I’ll communicate directly. I’ll be devoting many of the hours that social media hogged to emails, texts, and best of all: calls.
I’ll email you weekly. I intend to send a weekly article like this to whoever signs up for my mailing list. I’ll include something I love right now and something I’ve made recently. These will, for now, be song demos, so after this week they will only be privately accessible to my patrons. But scroll to the bottom for this week’s video (a thing I love) and song! (btw, future posts will probably be much shorter).
I want you to respond. This is not just an email blast. As I said, the time that I devoted to social media will now go toward emails etc. So email me back – I’d love to keep in touch and will respond. 🙂

2. Preaching to the choir?

If you’re in my circles, you may already agree. So you may still see FB/Insta posts from me. But that’s not me. I will never see your comments and likes. So comment on these blogs or email me at Brotherjsongs@gmail.com if you want to let me know you like something!

3. Marketing your music?

Marketing ≠ social media blasts. Seriously, there are other ways to market. Marketing just means “getting the thing you made to people who will want it”. My art is for you – folks who care. Sure, I’d like more people to hear it who might like it or be affected by it, but I’m more concerned with serving you than getting “likes” from strangers.
Patrons > fans. Rather than likes or streams, I need real human support and also income in order to keep me doing this music thing. So if you appreciate what I do, you’ll help me to keep doing it by becoming my patron (link below). This is incredibly encouraging and allows me to devote my hours to this work rather than a coffee shop. If you can’t spare $1/month but care a lot, leave a one-time tip at the bottom of this page or just join the mailing list and let me know you appreciate my work!
Could you help me spread this? If you do appreciate something I make (article or song), could you just pass it on to a friend who might like it? I’ll make it shareable with social media, but honestly direct connection is better. Tell them why they might like it.

This is also a call to action

1. Connect deeply.

Be present. Everything that’s happening on your phone is happening elsewhere. Don’t try to be there. No matter where you are, the beauty and wonder of life around you is probably going unnoticed. As a human where you are, you’re perfectly equipped to savor and love the world around you.
Humans’ best function is love. Love can’t be shared digitally in the same way that it can in person. Be a human: love somebody in person.

2. Join me, if you need to.

Only if you need to. It is not my concern whether or not you quit social media – but there are many of us who are truly addicted to social media and technology (mostly because of social media) and we need to pursue recovery. If you are facing an addiction, I highly recommend Celebrate Recovery (AA for everyone) as a resource for healing.
Either way, be mindful. You may not struggle as seriously as I do, but statistically it’s highly likely that you need to at least set healthier boundaries. Be mindful of your use of technology and set boundaries. It’s so worth it for love’s sake.

3. Help me create an alternative.

I have an idea. It may sound crazy, but I’m working on a new social network. I’ve decided to try coming up with a solution for every excuse for not quitting social media and every issue that its current forms have.
You could bring the idea to life. To be totally honest, I want this thing to exist but don’t know if I’m the right guy to make it happen. Steal my ideas, I don’t care. I just want it to exist, and I don’t care who makes money with it or who gets credit for it.
Let’s brainstorm. If you’re interested in offering ideas on how it could work or how it could happen, toss them into this brainstorming google doc — and pass on this article to any friends who might also have great ideas.

In the meantime, love deeply and be wary of the ways technology wants to master you. It’s a great tool and an awful master.

Then join my mailing list for weekly updates, become a patron if you appreciate my work, and check out the song and video below. 🙂

Peace and Love,

Justin Sinclair

(Brother James)

Someone Better

by Brother James | Song Demo

Join the mailing list for more

Who is Brother James?

Become a Patron!

Brainstorm an Alternative

I’m Quitting Social Media

This has been a long time coming — as many of you know.

The common response is “really??” and “why?” and “but what about..”

Somehow you and I have been tricked into believing we need this thing that didn’t exist a few years ago, is ruining many lives, and making all of us less happy.

Why?

1. I don’t feel connected to you.

My interactions on social media are not meaningful. We all want to keep up with our friends, but we’ve been duped into believing that social media is effective for this. There are of course exceptions, but on the whole I’m certain there are better ways to truly connect with each other.

2. I’m addicted.

**“I’m resting, being social, and being productive.”** This is what my addiction tells me, but of course none of those things are actually true. I’d rather devote these wasted hours – which are many – to truly restful, social, and productive activities.

Nothing has fully helped. I’ve tried several different methods for establishing healthy boundaries but I’ve come to the conclusion that, like an alcoholic, the best path toward health for me is abstinence.

3. Demand –> Supply.

We all feel trapped, like it’s a necessary evil. But it’s not. There are in fact much better ways to connect, and the more people boycott social media, the more likely it is that even a more helpful alternative will arise. In the meantime: text, email, and calls work great when not in person.

Negativity wins, so jerks reign in social media land. Negative emotions attract the most attention, and so businesses are playing into the social media anger-and-hate game, profiting big time by promoting content that gets heavy negative responses. So jerks reign.

What About…

1. Keeping in touch?

I’ll communicate directly. I’ll be devoting many of the hours that social media hogged to emails, texts, and best of all: calls.

I want you to respond. This is not just an email blast. As I said, the time that I devoted to social media will now go toward emails etc. So email me back – I’d love to keep in touch and will respond. 🙂

2. Preaching to the choir?

If you’re in my circles, you may already agree. So you may still see FB/Insta posts from me. But that’s not me. I will never see your comments and likes. So comment on these blogs or email me at Brotherjsongs@gmail.com if you want to let me know you like something!

3. Marketing your music?

Could you help me spread this? If you do appreciate something I make (article or song), could you just pass it on to a friend who might like it? I’ll make it shareable with social media, but honestly direct connection is better. Tell them why they might like it.

This is also a call to action

1. Connect deeply.

Be present. Everything that’s happening on your phone is happening elsewhere. Don’t try to be there. No matter where you are, the beauty and wonder of life around you is probably going unnoticed. As a human where you are, you’re perfectly equipped to savor and love the world around you.

Humans’ best function is love. Love can’t be shared digitally in the same way that it can in person. Be a human: love somebody in person.

2. Join me, if you need to.

Either way, be mindful. You may not struggle as seriously as I do, but statistically it’s highly likely that you need to at least set healthier boundaries. Be mindful of your use of technology and set boundaries. It’s so worth it for love’s sake.

3. Help me create an alternative.

I have an idea. It may sound crazy, but I’m working on a new social network. I’ve decided to try coming up with a solution for every excuse for not quitting social media and every issue that its current forms have.

You could bring the idea to life. To be totally honest, I want this thing to exist but don’t know if I’m the right guy to make it happen. Steal my ideas, I don’t care. I just want it to exist, and I don’t care who makes money with it or who gets credit for it.

Let’s brainstorm. If you’re interested in offering ideas on how it could work or how it could happen, toss them into this brainstorming google doc — and pass on this article to any friends who might also have great ideas.

In the meantime, love deeply and be wary of the ways technology wants to master you. It’s a great tool and an awful master.

Then join my mailing list for weekly updates, become a patron if you appreciate my work, and check out the song and video below. 🙂

Peace and Love,

Justin Sinclair

(Brother James)

Someone Better

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